Home » JOKES » Archive by category "Lawyers"
  • Possessions

    One day, there was a lawyer who had just bought a new car, and he was eager to show it off to his colleagues. All of a sudden, an eighteen wheeler came out of nowhere and took off the driver's side door with him standing right there.

    "NOOO!" he screamed, because he knew that no matter how good a mechanic tried to fix it, it never would be the same.

    Finally, a cop came by, and the lawyer ran up to him yelling. "MY JAGUAR DOOR WAS JUST RUINED BY SOME FOOLISH DRIVER!" he exclaimed...

  • The Lawyer’s Death Certificate

    A defending attorney was cross-examining a coroner. The attorney asks, “Before you signed the death certificate had you taken the man’s pulse?” The coroner says, “No.” The attorney then asks, “Did you listen for a heartbeat?” “No.” “So when you signed the death certificate you...
  • The Lawyer From Hell

    A man died and was taken to his place of eternal torment by the devil. As he passed raging fire pits and shrieking sinners, he saw a man he recognized as a lawyer snuggling up to a beautiful woman. “That’s unfair!” he cried. “I have...
  • Good Advice

    Taylor was desperate for business and was happy to be appointed by the court to defend an indigent defendant. The judge ordered Taylor, “You are to confer with the defendant in the hallway, and give him the best legal advice you can.” After a time,...