Organized Clutter

A blonde goes into a coffee shop and notices there’s a “peel and win” sticker on her coffee cup. She peels it off… and starts screaming, “I’ve won a motor home! I’ve won a motor home!”

“That’s impossible,” says the waitress. “The biggest prize is a free lunch.”

But the blonde keeps screaming, “I’ve won a motor home! I’ve won a motor home!”

Finally, the manager comes over and says to the blonde, “Ma’am, I’m sorry, but you’re mistaken. You couldn’t possibly have won a motor home because we didn’t have that as a prize.”

“No, it’s not a mistake,” said the blonde. “I’ve won a motor home!”

She hands the sticker to the manager and HE reads…

WIN A BAGEL

A blonde was weed-whacking her yard and accidentally cut off the tail of her cat who was hiding in the grass.

She rushed her cat, along with the tail, over to WALMART!

Why WALMART?

Hellllllloooooooooo… WALMART is the largest “re-tailer” in the world.

A man who just died is delivered to a local mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit.

The female blonde mortician asks the deceased’s wife how she would like the body dressed. She points out that the man does look good in the black suit he is already wearing…

A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire herself out as a “handy-woman” and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood.

She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.

“Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch,” he said. “How much will you charge me?” …

A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.

After becoming very frustrated with the “no haggle” attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, “Maybe I’ll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!”

The shopkeeper said, “By all means, be my guest. Maybe you’ll luck out and catch yourself a big one!” …

A policeman was interviewing three blondes who wanted to become detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he showed the first blonde a picture for five seconds and then hid it. “This is your suspect. How would you recognize him?” The first blonde answered, “That’s easy! We’ll catch him fast because he only [...]

80,000 blondes meet in the Kansas City Chiefs Stadium for a “Blondes Are Not Stupid” Convention. The leader says, “We are all here today to prove to the world that blondes are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer?” A blonde gingerly works her way through the crowd and steps up to the stage. The [...]